Mom Jobs I’d Like to Outsource

Becoming a mother has changed me in many ways. I have never been happier. I adore it BUT if I could outsource a few of my mom jobs my life would be nearly perfect. I’d frolic in meadows and twirl around under the setting sun with a huge smile on my face. There are some mom jobs I just do not want a part of and I don’t care who judges me for it.

Nail Trimming

I’ve been kicked and screamed as there is nothing pleasant about this chore. It’s obviously a necessary evil but I would like someone else to tackle it. How long do I have to do this? Can’t I just bring them to the salon with me? It’s been two and a half years and I am already over it.

Solution: I am handing this task off to Daddy.

Bubble Blowing

Blowing bubbles is so much fun…for the first two hours. My eighteen month old would love nothing more than to watch me blow bubbles until the end of time. The smile on her face sustains me for a bit but once I am covered with sticky, nasty bubble solution and flies start landing on me I am done. She isn’t. The drama ensues.

Solution: I am buying a bubble machine.

Potty Training

I am currently in the throes of potty training and loathe it. My son is still on the younger end but shows many signs of readiness. I have to admit I am ready to get the show on the road. Those diapers get realer by the day and my nose is about to fall off. Potty training requires dedication and dexterity that I do not seem to have in my sleep deprived state. Throw in a curious eighteen month old and the situation worsens. I hope once my husband wraps up this semester and is around a little more potty training gets slightly easier but I am not holding out hope.

Solution: No idea. Is there such thing as a potty training consultant?

Let’s make believe. What mom jobs would you like to outsource?